okay, so i had an early dentist appointment and no time for breakfast this morning. i threw some blueberries into a tupperware and brought them with me, and when i got to work bought a yogurt from the museum cafe next door. since there was only one brand of yogurt i didn’t bother to look at it too closely, just selected peach and paid for it. i stirred in my blueberries, took a bite and…that nasty whiff of sucralose crawled up the back of my tongue and settled, preventing me from tasting anything else. gross! creamy sucralose with a hint of peaches. i turned over the package and read, “dannon light and fit: o grams fat, 0 grams added sugar, 60 calories.” what the hell! so this is just orange goo that will pass through my system without actually nourishing me? i’m eating this because i’m hungry. i actually WANT to consume calories.

i hate diet foods.

plus, now i’ve just finished my snack and i’m still hungry, since i mostly just consumed a handful of blueberries dressed with a mystery substance that resembled yogurt.

do artificial sweeteners taste this bad to everyone? maybe i’m just hyper-sensitive, like i am to fluorescent light, caffeine, and other people’s emotions. i’m a delicate desert flower, people.